The Value on Self-Esteem

Here is a subject that can hit home for a lot of people. Self-esteem. It affects everyone in one way or another. The way this world is organized, people are usually categorized in one of two classes: ego maniac or zero regard for self. The ones who come in between are the extremely lucky ones.

Ego maniacs are the ones who have an unusually high self-esteem. This can be for many different reasons. That person may have great looks (and know it) or they might have extreme talent in education, sports, music, etc. or maybe they have both. Yes, there are also other factors as to why someone can have extraordinarily high self-esteem, but I'm sure you get the point and are already thinking of a name right this second. In rare cases, people actually use their ego as a cover for their biggest weaknesses and/or fears. People who are this way tend to be a major cause for other people having a very low self-esteem. They use their level of power and position, or popularity, to harm other people. I don't mean harm as in physically hurt them, although this is definitely a possibility, but I mean in the aspect of emotions and mental stability. Examples: Making fun of someone, putting down their beliefs, making racial comments/jokes, bashing their family or background, etc. Often, this is recognized as people "enjoying themselves" and having a fun, relaxing time with friends and peers.

People with low self-esteem almost always have reason behind it. They may have been torn down emotionally, mentally, and/or physically abused in some area in their life. The attribute of low self-esteem could have been formed at home, at school, in the pupil's own circle of friends, in an unhealthy boyfriend/girlfriend relationship, etc. You may ask, "Well, if it's in their own circle of friends, why would they hang around those people?" Often, a person with low self-esteem which started within their group of friends has only been able to find "acceptance" with those people. They may be made fun of and put down, but at least their "friends" still want them to stick around. (Even though it may cost them embarrassment, confidence in themselves, and any chance for a healthy social life.)

Low self-esteem, in my opinion, is probably one of the most difficult things in life to overcome once you have acquired it. The key to defeating low self-esteem is self-respect. The official definition of self-respect according to Dictionary.com is "proper esteem or regard for the dignity of one's character." Extremely hard to obtain, if you ask me. The best ways to form self-respect and confidence are by first, choosing uplifting friends. No, this does not mean you have to go ego crazy and start obsessing with being placed higher than others by your peers. This simply means friends who won't be constantly tearing you down. Another thing to start practicing is standing up for yourself and for what you believe in. If a person challenges your beliefs or your character, be prepared to give reason behind your views. Also, do not ever go around tearing other people down because, "that's what other people always did to me all my life so it's my turn to put them down." This is where you get the chance to take the higher ground and be, if you'd like to call it, "the better person." Simply follow the Golden Rule: "Do to others as you would have them do to you." So, if you do not want to be put down, don't put others down. Simple as that. Okay.. maybe it is easier said than done. But I believe it is still worth a try. If you mess up every now and then, it's okay. We are all human. None of us are perfect! So apologize and ask for forgiveness if and when the situation calls for it and move on. Continue to show your great character and personality. People will start to see a difference in you and they will begin to respect you! When others respect you it is just that much easier to respect yourself so give it a try.